Tonight, I marvel over Christ even more. A good girl friend of mine just messaged me a link to a video montage of the passion of Christ with the song "We are the reason" playing in the background. The video was just so painful and so eye-opening. It kind of felt like my whole body was being slapped with grease and dirt saying, “this is how unclean you are. this is how sinful you are. He died for you. Were you worth it?” But the main reason why I am in more awe of Christ is that she eventually asked me about the weekly youth fellowship we used to attend (due to conflict of our class schedule, we’re no longer able to attend). She herself wants to go there with us when we finally find the time… and with her group, too. It’s just so random and so heart-warming. It’s just so beautiful to see a soul thirsting for Christ. All glory to God!
There are only a handful of things I’m confident of. Amongst these is my ability to down a burger good for 2 people and surviving12 hours at school having had no sleep. Another thing that I’d like to add to my repertoire is my confidence on how I’m just not yet ready to enter a relationship. It’s not that I haven’t moved on or what. I’d like to savor the single life. In the past few months I’ve realized so many things that I had put on the back burner because whatever free time I had, I gave up for this guy. God certainly has more things in store for me than what I once considered to be the best that could ever be. Right now I’m sure that I am not “the one” for anyone yet. I still am a work in progress. And being that this course practically takes up 80% of my life, I see no room for a relationship to blossom. Let’s just say that I’m closing the doors because the room is still underconstruction.